An open letter to all parents from a non parent
I am sorry.
For judging you because your style went down the tubes.
For being annoyed when you forget to call me back.
For thinking you are not being a very good friend anymore.
For saying “I’ll lose all my baby weight, I’ll make the time.”
For telling my partner “we’ll be much sooooooo more relaxed about parenting than they are.”
For wondering why you don’t mind leaving the house looking like a drunk homeless 10-year-old.
For assuming you must be a hoarder now with your piles of clothes and teetering books and dirty plates
For calling your life chaotic.
For thinking that I will do it better and it will be easier.
For secretly considering your parenting techniques to be kinda’ weird.
For agreeing that I won’t lose my creative focus when I have a kid.
For being frustrated when I watch you forget your keys every goddamn time you leave the house.
For wishing you could just feed him and talk to me about my next career move at the same time.
For not getting it. Any of it. At all.
Another one
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