She's been practicing holding the bottle during feedings and will need my help to finish but this time she held and finished the entire bottle on her own.
Mommy is so proud and admittedly a little sad because you are growing up so fast.
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
All by myself mommy!
Emily woke up from her second nap hungry and as soon as I cradled her into my arms to feed her she reached out for the bottle, got a good grip on it and started eating all by herself! Impatience when it comes to food does not surprise me at all. I can't focus when I'm hungry...
She's been practicing holding the bottle during feedings and will need my help to finish but this time she held and finished the entire bottle on her own.
Mommy is so proud and admittedly a little sad because you are growing up so fast.
She's been practicing holding the bottle during feedings and will need my help to finish but this time she held and finished the entire bottle on her own.
Mommy is so proud and admittedly a little sad because you are growing up so fast.
Sunday, June 24, 2012
I liked it!
I don't know why it got such bad reviews. I thought it was great! I could be biased though because I LOVE SJP!
5 Months!
Happy 5 Months baby! You are growing up so fast and I love every second of it. You give me the biggest smiles when you wake up in a good mood and you are doing something new every single day. You scream ALOT and are expressing yourself in so many funny ways. You're trying so hard to crawl that you sometimes get frustrated and cry but don't worry because you'll have us chasing you around in no time. You love singing and babbling to Daddy and that makes me so happy. You've clearly expressed that you don't want to sit in your carseat when we're out so now you are in your baby jogger stroller and love it! Mirae and Minnie make you laugh lately and that warms my heart. I can't wait to see what new fun things are in store for this month!
Love, Mommy
Monday, June 18, 2012
Enough is Enough!
The weight will just gradually fall off while I take care of the baby and barely have time to eat...
FALSE.
When I go back to work next month and Emily starts daycare this is what my schedule will look like:
6:00-6:30AM - Wake up and get ready
6:30-7:00AM - Feed and get Emily ready
7:15AM - Leave for daycare
8:00-5:00PM - Work
5:30-6:00PM - Pick up Emily from daycare
6:30PM-7:30/8:00PM - Feed, bath and bedtime for Emily
8:00PM - 8:30PM - Make Dinner & clean up after dogs gone wild
8:40PM - 9:00PM - Hubby comes home
9:00PM - 9:30PM - Dinner (count me out now)
9:30PM - 10:30PM - Clean, attempt to pack Hubby's lunch and make bottles for daycare the next day
10:30PM - Sleep or work out??
Ok so when am I supposed to get in a good hour or two of exercise?? I'm not crazy enough to want to get up before 6:00AM to work out and going to the gym at 10:30PM is neither appealing nor safe, in my opinion. I suppose we could tag team and I would go work out as soon as Hubby gets home from work but then when will I ever see/hang out with Hubby M-F??
I've been trying to make changes in my diet but that alone isn't going to get the job done. I still don't feel like myself and honestly, I hate it. Plus, I just feel blah and unhealthy.
Do I just throw in the towel now and go shop for some mom jeans???
Do I want it bad enough to wake up at 5:00AM for a run or make my way to the gym (with pepper spray) at 11:00PM???
I feel hopeless.
FALSE.
When I go back to work next month and Emily starts daycare this is what my schedule will look like:
6:00-6:30AM - Wake up and get ready
6:30-7:00AM - Feed and get Emily ready
7:15AM - Leave for daycare
8:00-5:00PM - Work
5:30-6:00PM - Pick up Emily from daycare
6:30PM-7:30/8:00PM - Feed, bath and bedtime for Emily
8:00PM - 8:30PM - Make Dinner & clean up after dogs gone wild
8:40PM - 9:00PM - Hubby comes home
9:00PM - 9:30PM - Dinner (count me out now)
9:30PM - 10:30PM - Clean, attempt to pack Hubby's lunch and make bottles for daycare the next day
10:30PM - Sleep or work out??
Ok so when am I supposed to get in a good hour or two of exercise?? I'm not crazy enough to want to get up before 6:00AM to work out and going to the gym at 10:30PM is neither appealing nor safe, in my opinion. I suppose we could tag team and I would go work out as soon as Hubby gets home from work but then when will I ever see/hang out with Hubby M-F??
I've been trying to make changes in my diet but that alone isn't going to get the job done. I still don't feel like myself and honestly, I hate it. Plus, I just feel blah and unhealthy.
Do I just throw in the towel now and go shop for some mom jeans???
Do I want it bad enough to wake up at 5:00AM for a run or make my way to the gym (with pepper spray) at 11:00PM???
I feel hopeless.
Happy Father's Day
Emily is on the go! She hates to stay in one position longer than a few seconds and is getting better at rolling from tummy to back. She likes to let the dogs lick her hands and doesn't seem to find the same thing funny more than once. She has had carrots and squash so far and likes them both.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Monday, June 11, 2012
Life Right Now
My favorite products that are part of our everyday lately:
 |
| Aden & Anais Swaddle blankets |
Saturday, June 9, 2012
TTC (Trying to Conceive)
TTC, BFN, BFP, AF, PG, DH ...
These are some of the acronyms that you pick up on after countless visits and posts to baby and pregnancy related sites. These women speak in code. I'm very familiar with this because I've gone through the TTC journey. I've been wanting to write about my TTC story but put it off until today when I saw this picture speculating that Kate Middleton is pregnant.
I can't imagine the enormous amount of pressure she is under to become pregnant with the royal baby and what it must feel like to have millions of eyes watching and speculating if she is. One bad picture after a lunch of extra salty fries and the internet is buzzing with rumors of her slightly swollen belly.
I've always wanted to have children since I can remember. I've been watching TLC's "A Baby Story" since high school wishing that someday I could experience the miracle of childbirth. I love babies!
Hubby and I got married on May 16, 2009. I found out I was pregnant on May 13, 2011. In the following months after we got married, I began to secretly hope for a missed period followed by a positive pregnancy test. Date nights + no protection = pregnancy. Simple right? Not for some, including me. Each month my hopes would be up at the slightest headache, fatigue or phantom nausea. I would hope and hope (and then hope some more). Each pregnancy test brought three minutes of possibilties and wishful thinking until the harsh "NOT pregnant" took those possibilites away. To the makers of ClearBlue Easy and First Response: you're welcome. After the first year of marriage I started to wonder why I wasn't able to get pregnant when I was trying so hard. Friends were announcing their pregnancies left and right and it seemed everyone was, "POOF" with child at the drop of a hat.
Just relax and it'll happen. Have fun trying. When are you having kids?
These are some of the worst things you can say to someone who is stuggling to conceive. I know there was no ill will behind it and everyone meant well but everytime the subject came up, my heart broke a little.
I was told that if you don't get pregnant after a year of trying, fertility treatment options should be considered. We began our first steps in seeking fertility treatment at Kaiser around August of 2010, if I remember correctly. Before that I was drinking smelly herbal teas that my in laws sent from Denver. We both had the required preliminary tests done and everything came back normal. We were in the small category of "unexplained infertility." There's nothing more unnerving than the absence of a definite explanation to why I wasn't able to get pregnant. "We don't know" or "just because" weren't good enough for me. Our doctor at the time suggested we try the fertility drug clomid for a few cycles. Great! Bring it on! I'm READY! Did you know you can't take clomid if you have an ovarian cyst? YUP, that's right. Before the first round of clomid our doctor ordered an ultrasound and low and behold there was a big fat cyst on my left ovary. Another disappointment. I always imagined my first ultrasound would be to hear my baby's heartbeat but as it turns out, it was to point out yet another roadblock on my path to motherhood.
I was given three choices regarding the cyst: aspiration, birth control in hopes that it would help shrink and eliminate it or leave it alone and keep trying to conceive naturally. I chose the third option. Aspirating it seemed too scary, taking birth control at this point seemed ironically cruel and so the third option was the best option. And so life went on without a definite answer. It started to consume every part of me in all aspects of my life.
I didn't share my struggles with a lot of people. I only told a few close friends and at times I felt so lonely, so disappointed and so hopeless. It helped to read about the struggles of women online (there are a lot out there) and in that sense you find comfort knowing you're not alone but infertility isn't a club you're thrilled to be a part of. I became obsessed with researching anything and everything related to infertility. I began tracking my cycles, using ovulation sticks and generally acting like a crazy person. There's an inside joke that a woman desperately TTC can tell you her basal body temperature and the texture of her cervical mucus at any given moment. Crazy right???
In March 2011 we made an appointment with Pacific Reproductive Center. I told the doctor about my current situation and the game plan was to do an ultrasound to check the cyst, discuss options to eliminate it and then start with a couple rounds of clomid. We decided to commit again in May. We took the month of April to chill out. It was Hubby's 30th birthday so I concentrated on that and just decided to put my mind off trying to get pregnant until the next month.
The week before May 13, I was waking up every morning at 5:00AM on the dot to use the bathroom and remember thinking I should stop drinking so much water before bed. On Friday the 13th at 5:00AM I took a pregnancy test for the heck of it. By now, I was so used to getting negatives that I didn't put much thought into it. Before I tossed it in the trash I saw a very faint second line. In that single moment it felt like I had drank ten red bulls all at once. I woke up Hubby to show him but he said we shouldn't get our hopes up just yet. I went to work and wrote an email to the nurse at Pacific Reproductive Center telling her that I thought I saw a second line on my pregnancy test and that I was probably a few days late. She emailed me back right away and asked me to come in for a blood test whenever I had the time. I immediately asked my boss if I could take an early lunch and literally flew to have my blood drawn. The nurse told me she'd call with the results by 3PM that afternoon.
The time couldn't have gone by any slower. I couldn't concentrate, I didn't want to leave my desk for even a second and I was extremely anxious to say the least. At 1PM my cell phone rang and it was the nurse. I jumped up, shut my door and prepared for the worst. This was all in my head and now I was going to have to endure someone telling me that I was, in fact, not pregnant. When I answered she didn't sound excited, so I instantly felt incredibly sad that she was calling to confirm my suspicions. She continued to tell me, in her very monotone voice, the level of HCG in my blood and I asked what that number meant. All of a sudden she burst out excitedly, "congratulations, you're pregnant!" I literally yelled, "are you serious?!" and started crying. I also thanked her profusely as if my pregnancy was her idea. She told me it was still very early and that I should come in for an ultrasound the following week. I relished this amazing secret for all of two seconds before I immediately called Hubby and told him the news while choking back sobs of happy tears. I always imagined I'd tell Hubby the good news in a dramatic way but I just couldn't wait. In the following hour we called both our parents and both moms burst into tears also. I literally couldn't believe it finally happened and it was all so surreal. Even throughout my entire pregnancy and all the ultrasounds, it still seemed surreal until 9:15PM on January 24 when I heard Emily cry for the first time as she took her first breath.
I started this blog when I found out I was pregnant to document this journey and now it has become Emily's virtual baby book as well.
I've been given this very precious gift and I am truly thankful for my experiences. I feel humbled by my struggles and it has taught me patience and to savor every second with Emily. As cliche as it sounds, everything does happen for a reason. I wasn't able to appreciate that during my sad moments. It took me a long time to trust that things will happen when they will happen. I haven't forgotten my darkest hours and I remember how blessed I am when I find myself frustrated and exhausted. I have an amazing, supportive husband and now a beautiful daughter who brings me so much joy and for that I am so grateful.
These are some of the acronyms that you pick up on after countless visits and posts to baby and pregnancy related sites. These women speak in code. I'm very familiar with this because I've gone through the TTC journey. I've been wanting to write about my TTC story but put it off until today when I saw this picture speculating that Kate Middleton is pregnant.
I've always wanted to have children since I can remember. I've been watching TLC's "A Baby Story" since high school wishing that someday I could experience the miracle of childbirth. I love babies!
Hubby and I got married on May 16, 2009. I found out I was pregnant on May 13, 2011. In the following months after we got married, I began to secretly hope for a missed period followed by a positive pregnancy test. Date nights + no protection = pregnancy. Simple right? Not for some, including me. Each month my hopes would be up at the slightest headache, fatigue or phantom nausea. I would hope and hope (and then hope some more). Each pregnancy test brought three minutes of possibilties and wishful thinking until the harsh "NOT pregnant" took those possibilites away. To the makers of ClearBlue Easy and First Response: you're welcome. After the first year of marriage I started to wonder why I wasn't able to get pregnant when I was trying so hard. Friends were announcing their pregnancies left and right and it seemed everyone was, "POOF" with child at the drop of a hat.
Just relax and it'll happen. Have fun trying. When are you having kids?
These are some of the worst things you can say to someone who is stuggling to conceive. I know there was no ill will behind it and everyone meant well but everytime the subject came up, my heart broke a little.
I was told that if you don't get pregnant after a year of trying, fertility treatment options should be considered. We began our first steps in seeking fertility treatment at Kaiser around August of 2010, if I remember correctly. Before that I was drinking smelly herbal teas that my in laws sent from Denver. We both had the required preliminary tests done and everything came back normal. We were in the small category of "unexplained infertility." There's nothing more unnerving than the absence of a definite explanation to why I wasn't able to get pregnant. "We don't know" or "just because" weren't good enough for me. Our doctor at the time suggested we try the fertility drug clomid for a few cycles. Great! Bring it on! I'm READY! Did you know you can't take clomid if you have an ovarian cyst? YUP, that's right. Before the first round of clomid our doctor ordered an ultrasound and low and behold there was a big fat cyst on my left ovary. Another disappointment. I always imagined my first ultrasound would be to hear my baby's heartbeat but as it turns out, it was to point out yet another roadblock on my path to motherhood.
I was given three choices regarding the cyst: aspiration, birth control in hopes that it would help shrink and eliminate it or leave it alone and keep trying to conceive naturally. I chose the third option. Aspirating it seemed too scary, taking birth control at this point seemed ironically cruel and so the third option was the best option. And so life went on without a definite answer. It started to consume every part of me in all aspects of my life.
I didn't share my struggles with a lot of people. I only told a few close friends and at times I felt so lonely, so disappointed and so hopeless. It helped to read about the struggles of women online (there are a lot out there) and in that sense you find comfort knowing you're not alone but infertility isn't a club you're thrilled to be a part of. I became obsessed with researching anything and everything related to infertility. I began tracking my cycles, using ovulation sticks and generally acting like a crazy person. There's an inside joke that a woman desperately TTC can tell you her basal body temperature and the texture of her cervical mucus at any given moment. Crazy right???
In March 2011 we made an appointment with Pacific Reproductive Center. I told the doctor about my current situation and the game plan was to do an ultrasound to check the cyst, discuss options to eliminate it and then start with a couple rounds of clomid. We decided to commit again in May. We took the month of April to chill out. It was Hubby's 30th birthday so I concentrated on that and just decided to put my mind off trying to get pregnant until the next month.
The week before May 13, I was waking up every morning at 5:00AM on the dot to use the bathroom and remember thinking I should stop drinking so much water before bed. On Friday the 13th at 5:00AM I took a pregnancy test for the heck of it. By now, I was so used to getting negatives that I didn't put much thought into it. Before I tossed it in the trash I saw a very faint second line. In that single moment it felt like I had drank ten red bulls all at once. I woke up Hubby to show him but he said we shouldn't get our hopes up just yet. I went to work and wrote an email to the nurse at Pacific Reproductive Center telling her that I thought I saw a second line on my pregnancy test and that I was probably a few days late. She emailed me back right away and asked me to come in for a blood test whenever I had the time. I immediately asked my boss if I could take an early lunch and literally flew to have my blood drawn. The nurse told me she'd call with the results by 3PM that afternoon.
The time couldn't have gone by any slower. I couldn't concentrate, I didn't want to leave my desk for even a second and I was extremely anxious to say the least. At 1PM my cell phone rang and it was the nurse. I jumped up, shut my door and prepared for the worst. This was all in my head and now I was going to have to endure someone telling me that I was, in fact, not pregnant. When I answered she didn't sound excited, so I instantly felt incredibly sad that she was calling to confirm my suspicions. She continued to tell me, in her very monotone voice, the level of HCG in my blood and I asked what that number meant. All of a sudden she burst out excitedly, "congratulations, you're pregnant!" I literally yelled, "are you serious?!" and started crying. I also thanked her profusely as if my pregnancy was her idea. She told me it was still very early and that I should come in for an ultrasound the following week. I relished this amazing secret for all of two seconds before I immediately called Hubby and told him the news while choking back sobs of happy tears. I always imagined I'd tell Hubby the good news in a dramatic way but I just couldn't wait. In the following hour we called both our parents and both moms burst into tears also. I literally couldn't believe it finally happened and it was all so surreal. Even throughout my entire pregnancy and all the ultrasounds, it still seemed surreal until 9:15PM on January 24 when I heard Emily cry for the first time as she took her first breath.
I started this blog when I found out I was pregnant to document this journey and now it has become Emily's virtual baby book as well.
I've been given this very precious gift and I am truly thankful for my experiences. I feel humbled by my struggles and it has taught me patience and to savor every second with Emily. As cliche as it sounds, everything does happen for a reason. I wasn't able to appreciate that during my sad moments. It took me a long time to trust that things will happen when they will happen. I haven't forgotten my darkest hours and I remember how blessed I am when I find myself frustrated and exhausted. I have an amazing, supportive husband and now a beautiful daughter who brings me so much joy and for that I am so grateful.
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
I get it now
An open letter to all parents from a non parent
I am sorry.
For judging you because your style went down the tubes.
For being annoyed when you forget to call me back.
For thinking you are not being a very good friend anymore.
For saying “I’ll lose all my baby weight, I’ll make the time.”
For telling my partner “we’ll be much sooooooo more relaxed about parenting than they are.”
For wondering why you don’t mind leaving the house looking like a drunk homeless 10-year-old.
For assuming you must be a hoarder now with your piles of clothes and teetering books and dirty plates
For calling your life chaotic.
For thinking that I will do it better and it will be easier.
For secretly considering your parenting techniques to be kinda’ weird.
For agreeing that I won’t lose my creative focus when I have a kid.
For being frustrated when I watch you forget your keys every goddamn time you leave the house.
For wishing you could just feed him and talk to me about my next career move at the same time.
For not getting it. Any of it. At all.
Another one
I am sorry.
For judging you because your style went down the tubes.
For being annoyed when you forget to call me back.
For thinking you are not being a very good friend anymore.
For saying “I’ll lose all my baby weight, I’ll make the time.”
For telling my partner “we’ll be much sooooooo more relaxed about parenting than they are.”
For wondering why you don’t mind leaving the house looking like a drunk homeless 10-year-old.
For assuming you must be a hoarder now with your piles of clothes and teetering books and dirty plates
For calling your life chaotic.
For thinking that I will do it better and it will be easier.
For secretly considering your parenting techniques to be kinda’ weird.
For agreeing that I won’t lose my creative focus when I have a kid.
For being frustrated when I watch you forget your keys every goddamn time you leave the house.
For wishing you could just feed him and talk to me about my next career move at the same time.
For not getting it. Any of it. At all.
Another one
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
P.S.
I finished Hunger Games....MEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHH~ It was too hyped up for me and I started it knowing I wouldn't like it so I didn't.
Now what? I don't want to give in to the 50 Shades of Grey mommy porn madness either.
I finished all my hilarious books about motherhood and now I'm craving a really, really good read.
This and a nice hot coffee would be heavenly right now. Who else loves the smell of a good old library book?
Now what? I don't want to give in to the 50 Shades of Grey mommy porn madness either.
I finished all my hilarious books about motherhood and now I'm craving a really, really good read.
This and a nice hot coffee would be heavenly right now. Who else loves the smell of a good old library book?
I miss you naptime
Naptime is getting harder and harder lately. Two to three naps a day but they're 30 minutes MAX. If we're out she'll sometimes sleep 45 minutes but I cannot go to Walmart, Target, Kohls or the Cerritos Mall anymore.
Poor naps = cranky baby.
I've been trying to sleep train for naptime at home but she seems to have figured out that the longer and harder she cries, I'll eventually pick her up. When I do, I get a big gummy grin, raspberries and a big fat "YES, you caved again mommy!" I'm hoping she'll realize how awesome napping is by the time she starts daycare because I don't want her to have a hard time when I'm not there with her (omg tearrrrrrs againnnnn). She is also starting to show early signs of separation anxiety, especially when she's cranky.
Little Miss Em is getting more and more active literally by the day. Clothing and diaper changes become a mommy & baby wrestling match and she tries so hard to scoot around or crawl but her upper body won't cooperate yet which results in a very unpleasant downward dog. Even when I'm holding her she tries to climb me. Those chubby thighs aren't just cute, they're strong!
She's very into her toes right now and would probably suck on them if given the chance. She's been distracted by them during her last few feedings of rice cereal. Speaking of rice cereal, she enjoys about five to six spoonfuls before she loses interest. I think we'll wait a few more weeks to start her on the good stuff.
Poor naps = cranky baby.
I've been trying to sleep train for naptime at home but she seems to have figured out that the longer and harder she cries, I'll eventually pick her up. When I do, I get a big gummy grin, raspberries and a big fat "YES, you caved again mommy!" I'm hoping she'll realize how awesome napping is by the time she starts daycare because I don't want her to have a hard time when I'm not there with her (omg tearrrrrrs againnnnn). She is also starting to show early signs of separation anxiety, especially when she's cranky.
Little Miss Em is getting more and more active literally by the day. Clothing and diaper changes become a mommy & baby wrestling match and she tries so hard to scoot around or crawl but her upper body won't cooperate yet which results in a very unpleasant downward dog. Even when I'm holding her she tries to climb me. Those chubby thighs aren't just cute, they're strong!
She's very into her toes right now and would probably suck on them if given the chance. She's been distracted by them during her last few feedings of rice cereal. Speaking of rice cereal, she enjoys about five to six spoonfuls before she loses interest. I think we'll wait a few more weeks to start her on the good stuff.
 |
| Favorite new toy: my hair |
 |
| I'm mad you tried to put me down for a nap |
 |
| Just kidding! |
 |
| She scoots until she gets stuck in the corner, screams herself tired and knocks out |
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